Pistol Whipped

Pistol Whipped

Genres: Canadian, techno, unsigned, experimental

About Pistol Whipped

Comprised of three robotic chimpanzees, Pistol Whipped emerged fully formed from an electrical outlet in northern British Columbia on February 30, 2013. Lineup includes Rae The Random (Cell Phone, Cello), Kai The Great (Trumping, Trumpet.) and Sie The Silent (Bowling Balls, Vocals) Their drummer is a bovine. A Bovine with a fancy Tophat. And a cigar, but the robots disapprove of that. :( ...Except for Sie The Silent. She's a bad girl. (This is a lie. Made up by Kai. And this is a Rhyme. Made up by I.) Kai The Great has always been the most talented of the robots. (Also the most delusional.) However, if any of the robots has any defining trait, it's Rae The Random's compulsive lying. No one knows for sure whether it's in her programming or she just enjoys the rush of spewing bullshit from her jawhole (It wouldn't be the only jawhole-related rush she indulges in) (But Kai is the proffesional fluffer of the group.) It's the bullshit spewing. Though, her compulsive lying isn't as serious as Kai's severe cases of Herpes, ghonorreah, and crabs, which she received while being "assaulted" in her sleep by Rae, who in turn, received by being assaulted by Steve Jobs' newest version of Safari. Of course, Sie has had her own relationship problems, mostly caused by on-off lightswitch Joe Momma. (Joe Momma being the original Tangerine/Tamborine player, until Someones glass of water was dumped on his server. R.I.P) Joe Momma was soon replaced by Mai Dadi. Mai Dadi had talent like no other, until he got hooked on power surges. The band tried to get him into rehab, but the treatment wouldn't stick. He now siphons exess electricity from power lines on the street. And lives underneath your porch. Since Mai Dadi's unfortunate addiction, Pistol Whipped have gone through no less than 1298502 tangerine/tambourinists, all of the ending their careers in similar ways, all at the same time. Feeling the tangerine/tamborine would always be Mai Dadi's place, they stopped trying to find a replacement, and retired his spot to the wall of 01010011 01101000 01100001 01101101 01100101 Unfortunately, Pistol Whipped's career came to an abrupt end at the height of their career when Rae, following in Mai Dadi's footsteps, became addicted to power surges and fluffer's services. Sadly, Kai and Sie had introduced her to this in the hopes of coming out from under Rae's shadow. After all, Rae WAS the reason the group was so successful in the first place, likely for her flamboyant publicity stunts. But everyone knows, without those stunts, The band would have merely been a group of semi-sentient robots engaging in massive group fornication. HAWT fornication...Which they engaged in anyway. Usually in public. Much to many a fan's delight. They took pictures.

Taken from Last.fm

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